I receive hundreds of e-mails per day on my website from impassioned young women who torture their beautiful bodies because they see unrealistic or unhealthy female body types portrayed in magazines, TV, and films. Some of them are also getting pressure from parents, sib- lings, and boyfriends to conform to society's standard of beauty. For a small percentage of women, being skinny and willowy is ge- netic. This is their natural body type.

But most of us, at our healthiest and most vibrant, don't fit this mold. There are three basic body shapes and a variety of skeletal structures to consid- er, so why should only one body type be celebrated when there are so many of us? Vive la difference! There are many other flowers in the bouquet. I'm here to tell you it is time to take back our bodies and take a stand for who and what we are-Women: beautiful, strong, and proud! Even the traditional models and fashion designers are step- ping back and reevaluating the images they are putting out there and what a "healthy" and "beautiful" body means. Model Kate Moss, once known for her birdlike frame, reentered the modeling world in early 2001 with a few pounds on her.

And we now have a burgeoning full-figured modeling industry that is infiltrating the mass media with glamorous and self-accepting photos of women of all sizes. The first way to start boosting your body self-image is to think of your body as your friend, not your enemy.

Think about it: your body is the vehicle that takes you dancing all night and gets to be hugged first thing in the morning and takes you for long walks along a tranquil stretch of beach. You and your body make one heck of a great team. You are life partners. I honestly believe our bodies really are our temples. More than ever, women are demanding more realistic images in the media. They are sick of being force-fed size zero models. Even women who aren't plus size feel this way. There is a true hunger for reality. In the past, we'd run stories about body image, anorexia, or loving your body-and then we'd get letters from women saying, "That's all very well and good, but then I turn the page and see pictures of skinny-minnies!" We thought, "You know what? They're right!" and we realized we can have a greater impact by showing bodies that look like real women instead of just preaching about body love and acceptance. There is an enormous range of body types and it's important to see them. Ten years ago, we thought about these issues. But when the then-editor showed pictures to a focus group of gorgeous, plus-size women, the readers rejected the images. They thought the women looked too much like themselves ... and they weren't ready for that-"that's not why we buy Glamour," they said. Boy, have things changed. We used several full-figured models in our May/02 issue without calling attention to their size. If we are doing in such gloriously different shapes and sizes and every single one of us deserves to be worshiped. But I can promise you no one is going to be kneeling at your altar if you're not already rejoicing in your own unique beauty. And that doesn't mean squeezing into a size-six party dress, girl- friend! It means being strong and healthy no matter what shape or frame you were born with. The only way to achieve this is by treat- ing your body with respect-treat it right! Eat healthy, move your derriere, and tell yourself everyday that you are creative, intelli- gent, thoughtful, and beautiful inside and out. a story on shampoo, why can't we use a size 14:model? If we're doing a story on relationships and love and we need a picture of a couple in love, why not make her a size 12? We did a fitness story, and we showed three women working out ... and one of them was a healthy size 16. In that issue, we have a beautiful picture of a full-figured model, Mia Tyler, in her bikini with a little bit of roll around her tummy. And you know what? She looks incredibly sexy and confident and voluptuous! Showing these images is more powerful than just telling women to love their bodies. We had an unbelievable response from readers. Ten days after the issue hit the newsstands, we received over one thousand letters. One said, "There is a God, and she works at Glamour!" Other women wrote that they cried when reading the issue. One wrote: "You made me want to cry tears of joy ... you freed me!" And not all the responses were from full-figured women. Others wrote that they really appreciated seeing all body types represented on our pages. This is so different from ten years ago. Things are changing. This is the moment. Something very important is happening. Women are becoming more confident; they are saying, "Look, I'm a beautiful woman and I'm proud of my body." We at the magazine pledge to reinforce, on an ongoing basis, that women of all sizes are beautiful.

Posted at Thu Jan 31 2008 08:38 PM

Here are some tips that have been very helpful over the years!

10 Ways to Love Our Body National Eating Disorders Association

1. Think of your body as the vehicle to your dreams. Honor it. Respect it. Fuel it.

2. Become aware of what your body can do each day. Remember, it is the instrument of your life, not just an ornament.

3. Create a list of people you admire-people who have contributed to your life, your community, or the world. Consider whether their appearance was important to their success and accomplishments.
4. Don't let your weight or shape keep you from activities you enJoy.
5. Wear comfortable clothes that you like and feel good to your body.
6. Count your blessings, not your blemishes.
7. Every evening when you go to bed, tell your body how much you appreciate what it has allowed you to do throughout the day.
8. Find a method of exercise that you enjoy and do it regularly.
9. Don't exercise to lose weight or to fight your body shape. Do it to make your body healthy and strong and because it makes you feel good.
10. Think back to a time in your life when you felt good about your body. Tell yourself you can feel like that again, even in this body at this age. Start saying to yourself, "Life is too short to waste my time hating my body this way."
11. Eat when you are hungry. Rest when you are tired.
12. Surround yourself with people who remind you of your inner strength and beauty. (ok...plus two bonus ones) Get Moving!

Posted at Thu Jan 31 2008 08:46 PM

I absolutely love what you said about there being so many flowers in the bouquet. That is the best way of saying this that I've ever heard. :) I remember being carefree about this type of issue when I was a child, before puberty, when I would never have given a thought to looking this way or that way. I have never dieted, and I never will. I think it is wrong and it makes me angry to be indirectly pressured to by media and society, or even more directly pressured. How dare somenone else dictate to me (and to other women) how I SHOULD look to be considered beautiful. It isn't up to them. I am not going to have some goofy fashion police I've never met have power over what,when, and how I eat, and how I feel about my beauty and myself day to day. That isn't up to them. It's up to me. I do get really mad about this issue, as I've had MANY friends deal with eating disorders, years of low self esteem, and honestly it makes me fighting mad. One of my best friends more or less starved herself and worked out like a maniac to fit into a smaller size for her wedding. She succeeded in fitting into the dress, but the odd part was that soon after the wedding she sold her dress because she knew she would never be able to maintain that physical size. I think she got down to a four or six from around an eight, which she considered overweight. For her height and build, trust me, she was by no means overweight at a size eight. It made me sad that she would sell her dress. I bought my size twelve dress and wore it joyfully at my wedding. I didn't diet one minute and never would have considered doing it. I ate what I wanted and had some wine. It was my wedding, and I was going to live it up, just like my husband was free to and loved doing so. My friend barely touched her cake and she felt kinda lethargic and not herself, nerves and all added to being hungry. She hardly even smiled, and it was her wedding. I was stunned. I think if she had eaten normally, bought the same dress in a size eight, and not exercised herself into exhaustion, she would have had more fun.

I think you are great in doing the things you are doing to encourage young women and to be a role model. This is a huge issue for women I am friends with, such as when I was in college and happened to be placed on a sorority floor in a dorm, where the girls were seriously for the most part always dieting, anorexic, or bullemic. I lived with them and shared the living space with them, and they seemed to get sick all the time because they were more suseptible. They were not happy like that. I saw a few freak out over gaining five pounds (when it might bring life to their face and a more healthy look for them), and they compared notes on weight with each other. It was a small culture of eating disorders. I am glad there are individuals like you raising awareness about the tragedy of not living your life to the fulllest because of worrying over weight and loving yourself as you are. Young women and girls especially need to hear this message.

Posted at Mon Mar 02 2009 06:36 PM