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You asked. She answered. Our wonderful Emme-supermodel, superperson- helps you size things up and cope all the way around.
Q: I am 27 years old, have two kids, and am a house mom and student.
Between cooking and cleaning,
taking care of the kids, shuttling them
to all their events, and my studies, I
find I have virtually no time to exercise.
I really want to get in shape by
New Year's. Any ideas for this always
on-the-go mom?
A: I know how hard it is to find a workout plan that is fun, interesting,
and fits into your lifestyle. But as
we approach the millennium, it's time
to commit to exercise and the benefits
it will bring you. First, try asking your
neighbors if you can take turns watching
each other's children on a rotating
basis so you can carve out some time
for exercise. Or choose an activity you
love, such as hiking, biking, skiing,
swimming, or rowing, and try bringing
the kids with you. Family fitness
goes a long way, and if you like what
you're doing you won't be bored and
you won't quit.
Q: I've always had a good relationship
with my brother, but he, his
and their baby-to-be live in
York, and I live in California.
Given the distance, I'm concerned
that I won't have much of a bond with
my new niece or nephew. How can I
form a meaningful tie with the baby?
A: Your concerns are very real; many brothers and sisters feel the same
way when a sibling has a child. Forget
about the distance making it hard to
connect-a baby is coming and your
place in the family is about to change.
Because your relationship with your
brother is a strong one, the bond you
make with the baby will be super-special
no matter where you live.
Make a point of visiting around the
baby's birth and other important
occasions like holidays. And keep in
touch by phone. Let it unfold naturally,
and you'll do great!
Q: I have a nice relationship with a gentleman who likes me for who
I am, full-figured and all. How do I let
him know how much I enjoy his company
without scaring him off by using
the dreaded word love? I've been hurt
before, and I don't want to doom this
relationship by going too fast.
A: I say save using the word love until you're sure it's the real thing.
There is no reason to dread it, but
overusing it could send any man running.
You certainly can't hurry love
and it won't appreciate being pushed
along. Why repeat what you've
already learned the hard way? Take
your time and enjoy the wonderful
journey of getting to know someone.
Soak it all in without attaching your
romantic expectations, and in the
meantime, work on finding other
words to occasionally describe how
much fun you're having with him and
what special times you're sharing.
lake a deep breath and be confident
that you are deserving of the good
tllings that come to you!
Q: I am a 24-year-old woman .. My mom is Puerto Rican and my
dad is Irish. For the past few months
I've been dating a black man and,
believe it or not, my parents would
flip if tlley knew. Since I'm still living
at home, I'm feeling really guilty
about the whole thing. To top it off,
I'm starting to get very close to this .
guy, but I don't know how to explain
my parents' racism to him. Should I
just break up with him now before I
get in even deeper?
A: Whoa! Have your parents looked in tlle mirror lately? It's really
hard for me to believe you'd give up
this guy for the sake of saving face
with your hypocritical parents.
Racism is not the only problem
here-you're old enough to stand up
for your personal choices. This is a
great opportunity to grow. I think it's
time you had a long chat with Mom
and Dad about your beau. Tell them
that you don't understand their racial
views, especially since their own marriage
is a mingling of cultures. Hear
what they have to say and let them
know how you feel. Then ask them if
your boyfriend can come over for
dinner. Hopefully, your parents' main
concern is your happiness, and if they
see that this man is good for you, they
should be supportive. It's time to let
the cat out of the bag.


